Ok…I have a wonderful boyfriend. He loves me. Actually he adores me. And he is very very aware. He is 1/4 Native American, but passes well as a dark haired, dark eyed white person.
He is constantly checking his privilege. And, I love that.
HOWEVER… He is having a little trouble acknowledging his able-bodied or …I don’t know the proper term…..privilege, when I first brought it up to him.
I have a step sister. I adore this girl. We’ve become so close recently. She is mentally handicapped. She also stutters VERY badly.
Abe and I took her out for her birthday, and her ID was expired so two places wouldnt allow her to buy drinks, despite her being over 21.
Anyhow…..Abe kept insisting that she speak to the door people who check IDs and just tell them “hey, I know im from out of state..but heres my birthday” and then point at her birthday so that they will be less inclined to actually see that the ID is expired.
She tried to explain that she couldnt do that because she was very afraid to speak to strangers due to her stuttering problem and he just kept insisting that she speak to the door people checking IDs.
I have tried to explain the concept of his privilege in this aspect and he is having a tough time CHECKING his privilege. At first he had a tough time understanding able-bodied privilege, etc. He quickly began to understand but is having a lot of trouble checking his privilege or even realizing when hes said something potentially hurtful or privileged.
How can I better explain this to him? I always just say “Nope. Check your privilege” and he is ALWAYS open to listening and understanding….but I am having a tough time explaining.